Anybody seen the three desperados since the Vance Miller fiasco?    Amazing how quickly they disappear when there's the small matter of £5 million + to find, to pay for their incompetence. They're probably ferreting about in Cock-up Towers, looking for someone to blame.  We heard Sykes, Feeder of the Council,  was so upset he could only manage an eight course breakfast. He later became faint through lack of nourishment and had to be taken home in his fully customised gritting wagon.  Charlie, 'The Smiling Assassin' Parker hurriedly dashed out and recruited five senior managers to deal with the problem. He said five was probably sufficient as it was only a minor hiccup. We did notice, though, that he also appointed two whipping boys, just in case.  Alcock, Supreme Being, Controller of the entire galaxy, all powerful, omnipotent, broke down in tears as he realised his dream of unseating Mickey 'seven houses' Meacher at the election was fading fast. He could see his vision of years of unfettered troughing in the House of Conmen fading before his eyes.

WARNING: . . . .   These men are dangerous. If you see the suspects do not approach them. They will lie to you incessantly and promise you paradise, or an acre in Saddleworth, with planning permission, in exchange for your support.